A Time For All Things

Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine
Oh what a foretaste of glory divine!
Heir of salvation, purchase of God,
Born in His Spirit, washed in His blood
 - Blessed Assurance, by Fanny Crosby 


Growing up, my siblings and I loved to listen to "Adventures In Odyssey". We'd spend hours upon hours sitting around the cassette player, listening to our favorite stories of beloved characters while coloring, drawing, or doing crafts. Most of the episodes featured stories of fictional characters, yet some created radio-drama versions of historical people and events. One of these was Fanny Crosby, the author of thousands of Christian hymns. Fanny is famous for writing all these hymns even while being blind, however she wasn't born blind. As a baby, she contracted an illness which left her without sight. In the radio episode, Fanny tells the listeners:
"My only wish is that I had been born blind, so that the first face I would ever see is that of my Savior."'

The person she is speaking to in the radio drama asks if, surely, there was a time she was upset about losing her sight. Fanny concedes that yes, there certainly was, yet she came around to making the conscious decision to be joyful despite her circumstances. In the episode, she recited a poem which I loved the first time I heard it. I heard it so many times afterwards that I memorized it without hardly trying, for I adored it so, and repeated it to myself. At eight years old, blind Fanny Crosby wrote:


Oh what a happy soul am I
although I cannot see
I am resolved that in this world
contented I will be

How many blessings I enjoy
that other people don't!
To weep and sigh because I'm blind?
I cannot, and I won't



Of the many beautiful things Fanny Crosby wrote, her simple poem at age eight is perhaps my very favorite. I love her resolve to be contented, and to even find blessings in the midst of her plight. Yet to this end, I want to stress that I do not believe in the need to act happy and carefree throughout life. Sometimes, I feel that in Christian circles there is the expectation that we must automatically "count it all joy when you fall into various trials", as stated in James 1:2-3. Yes, we should try and get there, I believe, though there is also a place for grief: as Ecclesiastes 3 poetically states, "There is a time for everything." There is a time for mourning and anger and fear and doubt, because if we trust God through those times they can plant seeds of joy and hope and love and faith. Just because someone is dealing with PTSD, with panic attacks, with anxiety, or feels stuck in loss or grief or indirection doesn't mean that they are in crisis of faith and that surely they can rally forward if they simply read their Bible more. Sometimes, God lets us stay blind. Sometimes He lets us struggle our whole lives with something and we don't know why.

Fanny Crosby's parents searched for a cure to her blindness for three years. The kept hoping that something would bring back their daughter's sight. Yet nothing did. I applaud young Crosby's poem in part because of her resolve, yet also because of what I'm sure came before it. A little girl who grew up in darkness, who learned to take care of herself as best she could yet was likely resigned to always have to rely on the help of others. I'm sure she had plenty of moments then and throughout her life of being frustrated, afraid, angry, and lonely. I can imagine her feeling flashes or waves of all these things, and yet through it all, choosing joy.

It's not simple or easy. Sometimes, I worry that Christians try to make it so, as though there's a formula for having a good attitude and always making the best of everything. How beautiful if, instead, we each try to meet people exactly where they are. To say:

"I see your depression, I see your broken heart that is being stubborn to mend, I see your paralyzing anxiety, I see your fears for yourself or someone you love, and I want to sit shiva with you through it. I don't want to preach at you. I don't want to ask, "Still?" and expect you to be better by now. I just want you to get to a point where even if you are still struggling, even if you struggle your entire life, that you can say, "I am making it through today, and tomorrow, on God's strength. I am here, and because God is in control, it will be okay."


May we each, when we are ready, be able to say, "I am resolved that in this world contented I will be." Despite the restlessness of our souls for heaven, may we find contentment here and now. There will always be times when to be a "happy soul" seems like a stretch. Yet may we have faith for that day. May we not doubt the faith of others, but believe in their struggles and have faith for them. For all the tomorrows, or at the very least, simply and wonderfully, for today.